


Oil & Water

by Kagutsuchi



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Bonding, Drabble Collection, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-18
Updated: 2013-11-18
Packaged: 2018-01-01 22:19:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1049217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kagutsuchi/pseuds/Kagutsuchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drabble collection, most based on prompts received on tumblr. Explores the vast distance and ineluctable proximity between two veterans of the legion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

There was a pub near the sanitorium, a shabby, seedy place that existed only for passing through, where every doorway seemed to be cast in shadow. It was here that Levi had taken to drinking while waiting for Erwin to recuperate. He hadn’t allowed a habit to form - he was very careful about things of that nature - but recently, he’d been going here to drink until he could hardly string two words together. 

He made it a point to go when he knew he was most definitely not going to be otherwise occupied, and always alone. But even in his semi-lucid state, he knew that careful, sliding doubletime across the grimy floorboards to be hers, always walking as if she expected the first stranger she met to dip beneath her in a welcome tango. 

"Hanji…you can’t always…lead the dance, you know…"

She eased herself into the stool to his right, knobby elbows akimbo and hands deep within her pockets as they always were when she was turning something over in her mind. “Eh? What dance?” she asked. There was usually a keen edge to his voice; everything about him was angled. But tonight his voice cracked and spit like damp firewood. 

He laughed and it was more of a bark. He hiccuped weakly and Hanji smiled. “Ever the gentleman once your whistle’s wet.” 

Levi lay against the counter, his face flush with its cool wooden surface. Bleary-eyed, he lifted his head up and stuck his chin out in a show of defiance. She leaned over him, impervious to the mead on his breath, straightening his cravat.

And he leaned up and over and into her mouth. A mere brush of his lips against hers, but no one could mistake it. “Sometimes, I have to lead, you know?”

Hanji opened her mouth to speak, but said nothing, and he took it as an invitation. She arched her back up and away from him and put her hands on his shoulders. “You’re drunk.”

"Yeah, and you’re here. For how long? How many street corners will you turn before I lose count? Here or there, that’s all there is. Here or beyond my line of sight but never out of mind. Out of your mind, maybe, and down the maw of one of those shit-eating grins on legs.”

"That kiss was neither here nor there." But she smiled. "I can hardly expect you to own it in the morning." She hefted him off his stool and he slumped against her, sliding down her side until she lifted him bodily and held him against her chest and carried him home. She smelled only of her own pungent musk, not of the tang of titan blood, and he was glad that smells made for the strongest memories.


	2. Malaise

It whined like an insect at the base of his eardrum and chided him the way crows sometimes did from their carrion perches on the field of battle. They’d never have to worry about some simian beast devouring them whole and could mock him all they liked. But he always paid their nagging heed.

"Hanji? Where’s Hanji?" The nearest sentry shrugged, disinterested, and turned from Levi’s darting gaze. "Don’t blow me off, soldier. There’s no one here who doesn’t know who she is. Lanky, disheveled, prone to accosting people with her latest scientific breakthrough."

He had a feeling this time. It was the same feeling he had wending his way back through tall, dark trees, knowing that no beating, human heart would be meeting him in a clearing. Only a few broken bodies and the steam rising from a hulking mass of flesh and acrid blood to dissipate above the far-off canopy.

He heard murmuring some distance off, barely audible above the ringing in his ears. Dark clouds blossomed in his fading field of vision and he knew he was about to faint.

A cadet grasped him underarm and nearly gave way beneath the weight of his not insubstantial frame. “Corporal, she’s in the medical tent.”

"Shit," he murmured, then more emphatically, "Shit.” He stood up as fast as he could, wobbling and light-headed, and pushing the cadet aside, stumbled into the medical tent.

The late afternoon sun slanting through the tent slat left her a silhouette, but he knew it was her. He’d seen her rise so many times, something jagged and dark against clouds of titanic steam, so he could hardly fail to mistake her now.

"Levi," she croaked, laughing hoarsely at the vocal crack she’d split between the syllables. "Pardon me. I’ve been tending to the injured all afternoon and telling them stories, you know how I am. I always lose my voice eventually."

"Probably scared the hell out of ‘em." She grinned, and he’d never been so pleased by the curve of meager lips and small, shiny teeth that showed when she did. "Probably for the better."

Outside the tent, the cadet brushed himself off and turned to the sentry. “I’ve never seen the corporal like that.”

"Me either. Makes sense it was because of her though. I think everyone but the corporal realizes that."


	3. Warm, Benumbing

"I’m back!" she cried loud enough for anyone who might be loitering near the cavernous vestibule to hear. "Laid down some supplies and got my cadets some much-needed experience. All souls present and accounted for and mission accomplished!"

"Tone it down, four-eyes, no need to shake any more dust from these blasted rafters." Her eyes lit up as they alighted on Levi where he stood at the end of the hall, the only one who happened to be in the entryway of HQ. He stood awkwardly against the arch of the corridor, eyes hooded and arms crossed. "What took you so long? How many answer to your command now? You really shouldn’t go so long without taking some kind of leave in between missions. How many missions was that in a row? Five?"

It was true; she’d been gone a month without more than a day of rest between missions, which she usually took in town to gather lab supplies. She preferred a few long breaks in between extended periods of service so that she could conduct experiments, and she also performed well with the momentum of several completed missions behind her. But Levi was hardly one to talk.

"You were gone two months once, remember that? We’re of a piece, Levi, and I expect you to respect that." It was said in good fun, but if one knew Hanji well enough, it was possible to detect an edge of irritation in her tone. And he knew her well enough.

"Fair enough," he mumbled. She clapped him on the shoulder.

"I expect you to treat me to a drink tonight, as I always treat you when you come back. And I’ll be bringing a few of the cadets along, as usual. I’m sure they could do with something warm and benumbing in their gullet."

"Squad Leader, we can’t go for drinks tonight, I’m afraid," chirped the smallest of Hanji’s entourage, who looked barely fifteen with gangly limbs and hands and feet too big for his meager frame. 

"Oh? Why’s that?" 

"There’s another graduation ceremony being held and we’re expected to be in attendance."

"I see…I don’t expect we’ll be going out on the town tonight, then, Levi?"

"Yes, we will." Hanji raised an eyebrow and Levi didn’t seem to be looking at her anymore so much as looking through her and staring at something she couldn’t make out.

"What? Just you and me?" Sometimes they met at the bar, just the two of them, simply because they were both on leave and both wanted something to drink. Sometimes because Hanji knew Levi would be there and wanted to see him. He could take care of himself well enough, she knew, but no one should drink alone. 

"Of course. I’m not gonna skip out on a well-established tradition and desert of veterans of the Legion because some pimply-faced kids are moving up in the ranks. We could use something warm and benumbing ourselves." 

"Very well then. I’ll go change."

"No, Hanji…let’s just go. The mead will taste the same either way."

She laughed. “So says the guy in his billowy civvies. I’m gonna have strap marks a mile deep into my skin if I don’t change out of this damn uniform by the end of the night.” Her underlings all looked at each other with knowing expressions and stifled snickers. Levi rolled his eyes.

"You have to take every opportunity, don’t you?"

"I hardly know what you mean." She grinned. And it was true, actually. She didn’t. Hanji often thought on separate planes - what she said was said miles from the point at which her mind wandered untethered to present goings-on. She picked up on innuendo when it was processed, and not until then.

She sighed as she watched her cadets make their way down the corridor. “They’re so young, you know?”

"So are we," Levi said. "So let’s go."


	4. Not in Words

This is what Hanji’s dress looks like, btw (http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g57/minathegoth/2%20antique%20fashion/1aaav19.jpg). Tried to make it look like something people in Wall Sina would wear (i.e. fancy and vaguely Medieval/Victorian/Edwardian lmao what time period is SNK set in we just don’t know)

————————————————

"And wouldn’t you know it, he stayed up with me all night, Sawney did! Not a bit like his brother. Oh, wait, I’ve told you this one before, haven’t I?" 

The two of them were making their way back from a legion-wide meeting of squad and team leaders and Hanji had rambled for as long as they’d walked.

"Yes, you have." Levi looked up at her and found her staring resolutely down the road toward the stables. She liked to go for evening rides, he knew. "Hanji, could I ride you this evening? I mean ride with you. With you.”

"Hmmm? Oh, yes, certainly. I didn’t know you were aware of my evening rides." True to form, she hadn’t picked up on his Freudian slip because as always, her mind was so utterly elsewhere. He heaved an audible sigh of relief. "Why, you’re blushing like a milkmaid, Levi!" She grinned and his heart was so high in his throat that he was sure if he spoke, it would fall right between them. She tugged him by the ear and sent an undeniably pleasurable shiver down his spine with a conspiratorial whisper. "Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone it’s a date." 

He cleared his throat and stood stock still, her fingers still curved around his earlobe. “And what if it was?”

Hanji let her arm fall to the side and stepped back, slowly. “How…do you mean?” Her words were getting stuck on their way out. This called for delicacy, he resolved. There would be no exchange of feelings, mutual or otherwise tonight, at least not in words. He could manage that much. 

"I mean that you’re the woman I know better than anyone else. Hell, I’ll admit you’re the only woman I know much about, period. There’s Petra too, of course, but she’s a lot younger than me and it would be unprofessional."

"What would?"

Levi sighed deeply. “Erwin insisted I attend some military ball…thing…”

Hanji’s interruption was a mercy, saving him from verbally falling over his own feet. “Of course I’ll go with you! Erwin asked that I attend as well, so why the hell not?”

And that was that.

——————————————————————————

He arrived in a simple black suit, his cravat spilling milky white down its front. And she came all in a white so bright it was blue around the edges, all frothy lace down the torso and around the small train. 

Erwin watched the two of them make their way through the crowd to meet in the middle of the ballroom, and chuckled softly to himself. It was strange to see their roles reversed. Levi looked unexpectedly comfortable in his suit, and Erwin recalled that he’d once said that suiting up didn’t bother him, as he just thought of it as donning another uniform. Hanji looked anxious and tugged at the lace around her neck. Levi offered her his arm, and she took it with some reluctance. The commander waved them over.

"Why are you so nervous?" Levi asked as they headed in Erwin’s direction. 

"I’ll be honest with you, Levi, I…I haven’t attended something like this since I joined the Legion. At first, because I had no time, but later…because I didn’t like to be viewed as a lady. I don’t want to attract anyone’s attention because I don’t want to get attached to anyone that way. It’s easier, you know, being thought of as one of the guys. Lose a friend, lose a lover - it will hurt either way. But as friends, at least your love is less prone to stagnating and settling such that you can think of nothing else, dead or alive."

Levi stopped, and turned to her, looking right up and into the wide brown eyes he often avoided for fear of being drawn into them. “I completely understand. And tonight we are here as friends, nothing more and nothing less.”

They started in Erwin’s direction again and Hanji began to ask him if he felt the same about love, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Because when he had spoken, the hand on her arm had been shaking. For all the vocal conviction in his steady affirmation of her feelings, his body betrayed him. 

"Erwin, where’s your date?" Levi asked once they’d met up with the commander by a refreshment table, removing his hand from her arm for a moment to splay his fingers and crack his knuckles. 

"Didn’t need one. I have you all to talk to, after all. Dates aren’t a requirement or anything."

"Sure…" The whites of Levi’s eyes were wide with mortification. Had he known, he’d never have asked. But Hanji moved closer to him and gave his hand a squeeze. 

"You’re missing out, Erwin." She smiled at Levi, and again, he looked right at her as he so rarely did, his eyes no less wide than before. 

————————————

They walked home hand in hand. She didn’t want to feel it shaking again, and it didn’t. At her door, she finally let go. 

"Levi, I can’t promise you a thing, not a damn thing. I can’t promise you that I’ll be here, not even tomorrow." He took the same hand in his own, still warm, and kissed it.

"Love doesn’t need promises, Hanji. And I won’t ask for them." He left without a parting glance and she traced the palm of her hand long into the night. It hadn't been the first time she'd touched him, but it was the first time he'd touched her.


End file.
